![]() ![]() When he was in the ring against the likes of Bret Hart and Shawn Michaels, he was capable of compelling storytelling. His music was great, and until they became self-parodic, his entrances legitimately did have a uniquely cool vibe about them. When the WWE’s business was hurting in the mid-90s, he was a wrestler fans were attached to. There are a few things that are undeniable about The Undertaker. But don’t feel too sorry for him, y’all, because here’s the thing: The Undertaker Sucks But after reportedly signing a 15-year contract with WWE in 2019 (one assumes to keep things like his announced-and-pulled autograph appearance at Starrcast II in 2018 from happening again) and finding himself without the urge to wrestle post-WrestleMania 36, there has to be some return on investment, so we’re stuck with Mark, The Undertaker’s final form, a big charisma void who wears Thin Blue Line hoodies like a burlap sack and is willing to dress in his Halloween costume to congratulate your son on making second chair viola in his middle school’s production of Okalahoma assuming you’ve got $1,000 to blow. Over the course of his career, The Undertaker has been big on keeping kayfabe-before his episode of The Broken Skull Sessions put me to sleep, I heard him tell Steve Austin that if he had it his way, hard, uncompromising kayfabe would still be the law of the land. It’s unnecessary and, frankly, it’s pretty annoying. I don’t hold the answer to this question, but I’ve never seen anything quite like it for a living wrestler. With WWE struggling with ratings and its creative direction, why have they chosen to put so much time and energy into the reinvention of The Undertaker as Mark, a dad who makes pancakes? Is Drew McIntyre incapable of making pancakes? Making money? Sure, but that’s wrestling. There’s even been a press tour, featuring appearances on Hot Ones and in People Magazine. All of it has been strange to witness, as I cannot figure out what master it is trying to serve. They’ve done two separate month long documentary events about him. We’ve gotten weird merch, like Undertaker x Snoop Dogg shirts and Undertaker wine. But since his WrestleMania 36 Boneyard Match against AJ Styles, he and WWE have worked overtime to define what, exactly, the man’s legacy is. I’m going to stop short of saying that WWE failed The Undertaker at Survivor Series, because if anybody could have told Vince McMahon that it wasn’t the right time to finally, officially say goodbye, it was him. Ranking 2020’s Wrestling Merch Offerings (Based on How Much I Want It).Sublime Master Chef: Toru Yano’s Curry Reviewed.equally maskless Vince McMahon, and couldn’t rise above the din of the fake crowd noise The Undertaker had to keep pausing to pretend to acknowledge and appreciate, they could have saved that spectacle for when it was safe for audiences to be there for the last ride of wrestling’s ultimate “you had to be there to appreciate it” act. On the other hand, given that all of those men are old and maskless, had to part like the Red Sea for the even older. On one hand, WWE’s ceremony was befitting of the man’s legacy-not only did The Undertaker debut at Survivor Series 1990, but in having a bunch of his lesser rivals and members of his fake wrestling gang come down to the ring to witness a spectacle that included, among other things, a hologram Paul Bearer, they managed to send the man out on a note as corny as the one he was introduced with. I’m late to the funeral, but the 2020 Survivor Series is in the books, and with it, for now, the career of The Undertaker. ![]()
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